Sunday, July 30, 2006

Is everything going to stop?

So now that we have a new computer, and of course, I got the old hand me down, the dryer that came with the apartment isn't working. And I left laundry till the last minute this weekend. If its not one thing. Sometimes I think I'm the walking posterboard for Murphy's Law.

Down to two puppies. Jim says we are keeping one so, that means that Baby is the last one that needs to go. He's really cute so I don't think it will be a problem, but I'll probably have to put an ad in the paper as we are so far out from St. Louis, I'm getting a little worried.

Writing is not happening. I need to reexamine my time and see if there is any wiggle room to put it in. I haven't been paid for my June article yet either. And it's hard to know if they used my July one or not, since I'm 1600 miles away. I drive at least two to three hours a day for work. That's a lot of time in the car. But I hear that the pay rates on this side of the river are really a problem.

I feel like we are finally getting our crap together so hopefully, things won't break down on me too much. It would be nice to be on the positive side for a while and get things taken care of so I can get a house loan.

Well, I'm just whining so I think I'll stop now.

Its hot.............................

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Technical Difficulties

Of course my computer decides to take a summer vacation this week. I think it may have been the heat. So, if you don't hear from me soon, please be patient. I am taking it to the cyber vet on Saturday to see if there is any help, or if it, along with all of my recent writing is up for the graveyard. Back up, Back up, Back up. :(

Friday, July 14, 2006



Ok, well I have the picture now. It was an issue with Netscape. So, this is me in my natural environment. Ok, well it was my mom's birthday and Jim and I were at a small steak house with all of my brothers and sisters. (Except my half sister, who chose not to come.)

Finding the errors

Three posts and I've used the phrase, "not my cup of tea" twice. No wonder I have trouble writing. And what is it about me that even though I have a job that I think is going to work well (or, not as many holidays as state government gives you and it seems, no tuition reimbursement but still not a clerical job) that I'm still looking at the classifieds and Monster and finding "Wow, that would be perfect!" I guess its the grass is always greener concept. I don't regret the move I made away from the state until I hear my friend LaDonna talking about the cool things she's learning and doing from e-learning to project management. And I got to talk about accounts receivable and medicaid denials. Just not the same.

I turned down a development director position with a local medical non profit right after I got the call for the job I accepted. Cool work, but lousy pay. And, it was clerical. But now there is a clerical position with a healthcare publishing company that would be an entry place into the business. And a government relations position with a trade association. Ok, its not to say that I would even be interviewed for either, I didn't get called on the Medicare D trainer that would have been perfect for me (they don't know what they missed out on) but I still feel drawn to applying for those greener lawns.

And what was that answer to the question, what completes me as a person (ok, it probably was what is your greatest accomplishment in your life?) I don't have to find amazing personal satisfaction from a job/career because my life is big and the job/career is only one part of the equation. How come I've always made it my life? Hiding from my ex husband? Probably.

Yesterday, instead of going and finishing my other jobs, I went to the library and wrote a little and found several books to take home with me. I love the library just like a good bookstore, like the one I found in Seattle, when I was waiting for my plane, or was it Portland? It must have been Portland, when I worked for Marquis and had to go to those stupid meetings every quarter. But anyway, I was walking through the stacks by the fireplace (non fiction area) and my mind came up with several ideas for articles or at least essays. Write about what you know. Living with a partner with mental illness. Raising a gifted child. Raising a child in a dysfunctional home. Divorce, a blessing. Choosing Psycho men, what to look out for. Power relationships, what to do if you are on the wrong side. Working with kids with disabilites. Making a non marriage work. Places I love in Illinois, St. Louis.

So at least my writer side is still there, waiting to come out and play. I just need to schedule it a play date with a notebook or a Word document. But today is a finishing day. And I am late for my walk. The dogs are waiting by the door.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Relaxation time

I finally have a job. After six weeks of worry and diriving and sending my resume to every possible job opening in the area. I have landed on my feet. And, it's not clerical. Ok, well most jobs are clerical when you get down to it, but this one is for a company that has advancement possibilities, and I'm going to be working on my Masters at the same time so that I can finally say I have it. I worked with several temporary services out here and the one advantage to that was I tested my way through their systems and really felt good about my skills in those areas. It was a good brush up for me.

So now I can stop thinking about paying the bills and start thinking about writing again. I've been spending so much time doing mystery shops or merchandising and going on interviews that my days have been filled. Jim goes off to work at 6 so he's back at the house by 3. And I just can't seem to write when he's here. Funny, that.

I was thinking yesterday during my walk, that I should carry the digital camera and give you some ideas about what the lay of the land looks like.I've seen a lot of neat things during the last two months, and I haven't written about them at all, unless you count the art museum. And I didn't even wax poetic about Forest Park, where the museum calls home. Its has the history museum, the zoo, and a lot more. One of my interviewee's said that it is bigger than central park in New York and was park of the World's Fair when it was in St. Louis. Do they even have World's Fair's anymore? And just down the street is the old brewery building. There is three houses attached to the brewery where the owners used to live and they have a tunnel and storage cave underneith the houses where they stored the beer to keep it cool.

We didn't go down to the arch for the fireworks, everyone was feeling a little off that day so we watched it on the big screen. Not really the same. There's a Busch race coming to the Gateway track the end of this month and I'm trying to figure out a way to get tickets. Howcome everything has to cost so much.

I didn't go to the writer's group meeting at the library because I didn't write down the specifics of where I found the information. And driving into St. Louis again, after being there all day dropping of phamplets to doctor's offices (one of my merch jobs) just seemed a little much. But I did watch the Stephen King mini series. The first one about the assassin who kills a toy maker and then gets killed by one of his advendging toys was better left as a read rather than putting it on tv. There is just something that gets lost in the translation. And, there was no dialog during the entire hour! Maybe artsy but not my cup of tea.

The second one was more my style about a couple who is on their honeymoon in England and finds a rip in the dimensional fabric. I had less problem believing the dimensional rip than I did the characters. I felt they were written or acted, very two dimensional and didn't really feel real to me, but boy I believed the monster. I guess I'm stuck with a writer's mind set, even when I'm relaxing and just zoning out on the telly.

Well, the dogs are begging for their walk and the dishes from last night still needing to be done and I still have to do a full day or two of mystery shops and doctor visits before I go to my new job on tuesday., so I need to kick it into high gear and get going.

Monday, July 03, 2006

Well, I'm having no luck at all adding a picture to my blog. I wonder sometimes if its not the computer and/or the fact I use Netscape, or if its just my inadequacy with the new technology. So, I've read the help screens and they say its so easy, just point and click but when I do, no window pops up like it suppose to do, so for right now, I'm pictureless.

Job search is still going, I wonder if I'm not spending enough time pounding the streets, but my situation doesn't lend itself well to just showing up on someone's door and saying, "Hey, do you want to hire me?" I'd be calling Jim to post my bail after being arrested and tested for a looney. And I'm not keen on spending another night in jail, I don't think I have enough water in my system to cry that much. (Another story there, but not today.)

I took some time friday to visit the St. Louis Art Museum. Its totally free on fridays as is the zoo, and the art museum. I guess the Science Center is always free for most exhibits but you have to pay for parking. It was outstanding. Coming from Boise where the Art Museum is the size of my old house, ok, maybe a tad bit bigger, but not much, I was impressed at the size of all the galleries. And the diversity of art was amazing. I am more drawn to European Art, (I'm a purest), but they spanned the globe and time. I saw one exhibit, that they usually charge for, called Remote Viewing, its suppose to be a futuristic view of art from other dimensions, think Star Trek on acid. Not my cup of tea, but they had youth guides walking kids groups through and explaining the art which I thought was amazing. (By the way, if you are with the Art Musuem and are reading this, I applied for the Publication Assistant position and would really like to talk to someone about the job.) This was a paid political announcement from the Get Lynn Working Campaign, Jim Cahoon, Treasurer.

But back to the art I did like. They had two Monet's that were amazing, and one of Dega's statues of a pre teen dancer. (What would we call him today for his passions?) I like the old dark oil paintings like those of woman with knitting or Mrs. Thomas Somethingorother. Why would you name a woman's picture based on the fact she was her husband's property? One more piece of the puzzle that brought us the womans liberation movement. They have an Eygptian mask that they are fighting with Eygpt over ownership. It was prettier in the paper when I just saw the picture. And they have three coffins and mummys. Now, it really got me thinking about what kind of society are we that we display the dead of other societies as art? The covers are beautiful and the displays also show the jars that the internal organs were kept in as well as xrays of the bones of these dead people. It was like a visit to a strange morgue. (see, I need to get back to work, my brain is thinking too much!)

With that, time to go copy some more resume's and write cover letters. Wish me luck or maybe just send food. I like Ramen and it doesn't cost much to ship.

Sunday, July 02, 2006

Welcome to my world

Well, its been said that if you write today, you are a writer, so, instead of working on my novels in progress, I've chosen to build a blog. I guess its more entertaining than the 20K resume's and coverletters I've been sending lately. Or going to another job interview. How many ways can you answer the following: "Tell me about a time that you ran into a problem at work and how you solved it?" Or "Why did you apply to work with us?" (Hint: the answer to the last question is not a job, any job!)

I am a new resident to Illinois, Although I'm closer to St. Louis, MO. I used to live in Idaho. And these two places are the only places I've ever lived. My son says I'm moving through the states alphabetically, so Iowa, get ready, you're next.

So besides looking for work and avoiding writing, how do I spend my days? Well I have a personal trainer who works out with me every morning. Now before you get jealous, its really two personal trainers, Bella and Demon, my Pomeraniums. (Does spelling count here?) I made the mistake of starting to take them for a walk every morning, besides, what else do I have to do? Now, I'm committed. I'll be laying in bed, sleeping, something I like to do at 6:00 am, when Demon will start petting my face with his paws. "Get up, get up."

Now if I can manage to put him off for a while, I'll be sitting at the computer, going through my email, seeing what my stars have in store for me and he'll start begging. But he doesn't just look at me. He does the up on the back legs, paws in the air wave. Its just too much to take on no coffee, so I give in. I hate to see what time I'm going to have to get up when I do finally have a job!

An article idea is calling. Better go while the muse is in a good mood.

Lynn